So, these past few days have been interesing. I went to homecoming, that was fun. Although, I think it would've been much more fun if the girl who had asked me, didnt use me as a last resort. Whatever. I went along for the ride, had a good times. Life goes on.
Secondly... well, not much else has happened. The whole thing with Margie went kaboom, because she couldnt keep her mouth shut. Meh. She told Justin that I had something I'd never tell him. So much for secrecy right? As of now, they are once again a completely happy couple, and life is going great for them. Awesome stuff.
Thirdly. My "date" to homecoming, Genevieve. She asked me to go to homecoming as "Friends", okay, I can understand that. Nobody else to go with, awesome. Now, maybe if she showed some of the signs of friendship towards me... I might not feel so... used? A definition of "friend" from Dictionary.com is this
"1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
2. a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter"
Two of the six right there. Now, if I were to examine what is between me and Genevieve, I seriously doubt it is a friendship. She is not even closed to being in ANY WAY "Attatched" to me. First off. Secondly, I dont believe she had given me any assistance, OR support. Maybe when we first met, for what, two weeks? Dont mind me rambling, but I seriously think something is screwed. up. right there. Worst part about it is? I cant talk to her about it. She either wont care, wont change, or just ignore me completely. Sure, even if i DID try, I'd be saying "Hey, be my friend" Last time I checked, you cant force a friendship. Its usually a mutual thing.
It gets better though. Check this out, Homecoming night went okay, I was closer'ish to her most of the night, and we got along pretty well. Now, see, I dont really "like" someone unless I think there may be a chance. Keeps me from being just overall stupid. Anyway, so I pondered the thought of liking Genevieve. Figured, aww heck, why not? We get along pretty well, She's really pretty, and I think it might work out okay. So, I ask Margie if maybe she could poke around in a way to see if Genevieve might give me another chance. Aparently, Genevieve would. She didnt even have to ask... and I kinda know that as truth. Seriously, if she's not even a real friend right now, what makes me think she'd consider going out with me? idk. Maybe I was tired that night, but like, as soon as I asked this question, I get something of a response later
"You just need to get out of our grade"
Seriously? Would "Hey, I know you may like her, but I think it'd be best if you just stick with your own age group." not work? Honestly because like, i'm not a thickheaded kid. I usually catch onto things people are feeling or thinking before they care to tell me. But to come out THAT strongly, and THAT blunt, I think is just plain mean. "I'm a very blunt person, you should know that." I believe, what she's trying to say is, "I know this hurts, and I know its rather mean to say it, but I dont really care about you." If you seriously are a friend to someone, you dont treat them like trash. You treat them as a friend. Whether the situations good or not. Oh well though, our society today says its okay to be completely rude to others, and be able to get away with it. Nobody cares. Your not alloud to care.
So. There's my "crying" for you. Of course, NOBODY reads this now, because I changed the site adress. So I'm pretty much good to say whatever I feel like it from here on in. Woohoo.
Yeah.... Thats about it for tonight. Woot for venting.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Well now
Considering the fact that I problably lead anyone off who WAS reading this, here goes a few bits of my mind for everyone... aka: nobody.
So, I like this girl named Margie. Yet, she's going out with my best friend. Had some history within all that, but its history. Done, over with. She went with him, and here I am. Although, lately, it almost seems as if she's regretting it slightly. I mean, she likes him, but it almost seems as if she would like to pick someone else go for.
She mentions that she is looking at the broader side of the dating horizon, which almost makes me think I might have a chance in the near future. That'd be awesome... except, well, what if she pulls another Justin? Do I seriously want to go through all of this..... again? Aparently I just didnt size up to Justin. So like... whats to keep that from happening again? Obviously she chose someone else over me in the first place, so I have some big doubts in the whole scheme of this. Dont get me wrong though. If there was some way to know that that wouldnt happen.... I'd be there in a heartbeat.
Idk, it seems like being..... 2nd best, I guess you could say, isnt quite what I had wanted it to be. Life certainly isnt perfect, and we cant have everything that we want, but just. Maybe some things are meant to work out not well?
My mind tonight, is doing some serious mulling. Its thinking, and confusing itself. I'm also mentally fatigued beyond belief so that may have something to do with it. I think I'm just being more open than I usually am.
If anyone does end up reading this, just remember. Its a blog. Its something I use to vent. Some of the things I say on here may be true, and others I could just be emotional about. Haha, thats right. Me. Martin, emotional. Amazing, I know.
This represents my thoughts, and maybe where I think blame should be. But honestly, this is some of my more selfish, and random thoughts, that I can say without really having to worry about it. If you ARE reading this, its your own decision, and you accept the responsability of what you see here. Sorry if its not sugar-coated.
So today in band was fun. 2 hours of wasted time, and 15 minutes out late. Kaminsky is a good guy, but he seriously needs to get his act together. My main complaint? No eye contact. He always tells us that being on-time, is 15 minutes late. So why cant you follow through, and actually let us out ON time? If you make such a big deal about us, why dont you step up to the plate, and actually try what your talking about? Rawr.
Quick-Random update from me, that wasnt really quick. I thought about most of this rather slowly. lol, whatever. if you read this? Kudos.
Have a cookie. See ya around.
Oh, PS, Margie, if you DO read this. Your last hint, for that second blog is " - "
GL, HF
So, I like this girl named Margie. Yet, she's going out with my best friend. Had some history within all that, but its history. Done, over with. She went with him, and here I am. Although, lately, it almost seems as if she's regretting it slightly. I mean, she likes him, but it almost seems as if she would like to pick someone else go for.
She mentions that she is looking at the broader side of the dating horizon, which almost makes me think I might have a chance in the near future. That'd be awesome... except, well, what if she pulls another Justin? Do I seriously want to go through all of this..... again? Aparently I just didnt size up to Justin. So like... whats to keep that from happening again? Obviously she chose someone else over me in the first place, so I have some big doubts in the whole scheme of this. Dont get me wrong though. If there was some way to know that that wouldnt happen.... I'd be there in a heartbeat.
Idk, it seems like being..... 2nd best, I guess you could say, isnt quite what I had wanted it to be. Life certainly isnt perfect, and we cant have everything that we want, but just. Maybe some things are meant to work out not well?
My mind tonight, is doing some serious mulling. Its thinking, and confusing itself. I'm also mentally fatigued beyond belief so that may have something to do with it. I think I'm just being more open than I usually am.
If anyone does end up reading this, just remember. Its a blog. Its something I use to vent. Some of the things I say on here may be true, and others I could just be emotional about. Haha, thats right. Me. Martin, emotional. Amazing, I know.
This represents my thoughts, and maybe where I think blame should be. But honestly, this is some of my more selfish, and random thoughts, that I can say without really having to worry about it. If you ARE reading this, its your own decision, and you accept the responsability of what you see here. Sorry if its not sugar-coated.
So today in band was fun. 2 hours of wasted time, and 15 minutes out late. Kaminsky is a good guy, but he seriously needs to get his act together. My main complaint? No eye contact. He always tells us that being on-time, is 15 minutes late. So why cant you follow through, and actually let us out ON time? If you make such a big deal about us, why dont you step up to the plate, and actually try what your talking about? Rawr.
Quick-Random update from me, that wasnt really quick. I thought about most of this rather slowly. lol, whatever. if you read this? Kudos.
Have a cookie. See ya around.
Oh, PS, Margie, if you DO read this. Your last hint, for that second blog is " - "
GL, HF
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Argh
Argh argh argh arGH!!!!!!!
Seriously, Margie made a dent in me that wont be repaired for a long, long time. Bit of background, as to why.
We have the most in common, as of anyone else I know. Seriously? Our personalities mesh so well its not even funny. If Me and Emily had even HALF of the chemistry that Margie and I do, I would be happy.
That alone is enough to make me go crazy for atleast a few months... which it has. Then came the day when she decided that she didnt like me anymore. That was a harsh one. She chose Justin, one of my best friends to this day. And somehow, she expects me to live with it. If your reading this, that sounds horrible, but nobody does read it, so I can tell it in its pure view to me.
So, Justin asked her out, second day of school, and of course, she says yes. That about killed me. I drew some random freaking picture trying to vent emotions, and it hasnt helped. For awhile now, I suppose I've been doing pretty good about my feelings for her, but as time goes on, I keep seeing her, because she's my best friends girlfriend. What. The. Hell. Seriously? I dont like, EXTREMELY like her right now, but given the chance, and the right time, I could see it working. Quite well.
Worst of it all, She's been bringing up the past to me. Considering we're friends, its all good to talk about it now. I mean, I had done really well! No real feelings coming back to haunt me, but then she braught up Iron Man. That was the first real movie that I knew she liked me, and I was testing the waters of her personality. Seriously? That was one of the most fun, and enjoyable movies of my life. She braught it up, and it just unthawed about 2-3 months worth of freezing. Emotionally.
This is only my way of getting things out, and attempting to vent. My dog Gingers next to me, and I suppose I should give her some attention. So here goes.
Argh.
Seriously, Margie made a dent in me that wont be repaired for a long, long time. Bit of background, as to why.
We have the most in common, as of anyone else I know. Seriously? Our personalities mesh so well its not even funny. If Me and Emily had even HALF of the chemistry that Margie and I do, I would be happy.
That alone is enough to make me go crazy for atleast a few months... which it has. Then came the day when she decided that she didnt like me anymore. That was a harsh one. She chose Justin, one of my best friends to this day. And somehow, she expects me to live with it. If your reading this, that sounds horrible, but nobody does read it, so I can tell it in its pure view to me.
So, Justin asked her out, second day of school, and of course, she says yes. That about killed me. I drew some random freaking picture trying to vent emotions, and it hasnt helped. For awhile now, I suppose I've been doing pretty good about my feelings for her, but as time goes on, I keep seeing her, because she's my best friends girlfriend. What. The. Hell. Seriously? I dont like, EXTREMELY like her right now, but given the chance, and the right time, I could see it working. Quite well.
Worst of it all, She's been bringing up the past to me. Considering we're friends, its all good to talk about it now. I mean, I had done really well! No real feelings coming back to haunt me, but then she braught up Iron Man. That was the first real movie that I knew she liked me, and I was testing the waters of her personality. Seriously? That was one of the most fun, and enjoyable movies of my life. She braught it up, and it just unthawed about 2-3 months worth of freezing. Emotionally.
This is only my way of getting things out, and attempting to vent. My dog Gingers next to me, and I suppose I should give her some attention. So here goes.
Argh.
Friday, September 5, 2008
The Finer Joys of Life
So, I broke up with my girlfriend today. Thank. God.
Honestly? I should've listened to my GUT FEELING on that one. It hasnt lead me wrong when it comes to girls. WTF is my problem. Srsly? I dont know.
Emily; Hot girl. Dark skin, Brown eyes. Long legs, toned muscles. Sounds like a dream right? Especially for a kid like me. Goodness. But under that finely toned, tanned skin... She has a personallity that I hope Iwont ever encounter again.
She gets annoyed... QUITE easily. I couldnt be ME around her!! She'd be like, MARTIN STOP THAT!! Or just, DONT DO THAT AGAIN. RAWR RAWR RAWR. I might be overexaggerating just a BIT but you know. Nobody I knows going to read this, so its okay.
Yeah. Our personalities plain out just, Did not match. We're two COMPLETELY different people. Like, for real.... So yeah. There's that.
Although, I will miss those kisses. She was a damn good kisser.... Oh well. My fault. Life goes on.
=]
Our first HS football game was tonight. As in, BAND oriented game. We did pre-game. Cool stuff...
Our first show wasnt horrible. Could've been better... and I'm sure it will later on. I didnt make too many mistakes, but darn, you certainly do lose your breath on this one.....
Random update. There it is. Had to get that Emily thing out of my system. WOOT. LIFE IS GOOD! IM SINGLE!!!
Honestly? I should've listened to my GUT FEELING on that one. It hasnt lead me wrong when it comes to girls. WTF is my problem. Srsly? I dont know.
Emily; Hot girl. Dark skin, Brown eyes. Long legs, toned muscles. Sounds like a dream right? Especially for a kid like me. Goodness. But under that finely toned, tanned skin... She has a personallity that I hope Iwont ever encounter again.
She gets annoyed... QUITE easily. I couldnt be ME around her!! She'd be like, MARTIN STOP THAT!! Or just, DONT DO THAT AGAIN. RAWR RAWR RAWR. I might be overexaggerating just a BIT but you know. Nobody I knows going to read this, so its okay.
Yeah. Our personalities plain out just, Did not match. We're two COMPLETELY different people. Like, for real.... So yeah. There's that.
Although, I will miss those kisses. She was a damn good kisser.... Oh well. My fault. Life goes on.
=]
Our first HS football game was tonight. As in, BAND oriented game. We did pre-game. Cool stuff...
Our first show wasnt horrible. Could've been better... and I'm sure it will later on. I didnt make too many mistakes, but darn, you certainly do lose your breath on this one.....
Random update. There it is. Had to get that Emily thing out of my system. WOOT. LIFE IS GOOD! IM SINGLE!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
